Realistically, we are all story tellers…but some stories are more damaging than others.
We tell stories when we share the latest news or when we share things happening in our lives. We even tell stories when we try to get out of situations we don’t want to be in….you know what I mean… the little white lie you tell when you really don’t want to do something…. but can’t come right out and say it? Well….that’s a story. But the most damaging stories are the ones we tell ourselves that prevent us from achieving our goals. These stories have an emotional attachment to them… ...and when we add emotion (positive or negative) to a story, it becomes more believable and it eventually plays out. For example, let’s say your current story is ”I can’t get out of debt!”…and every time you think of your debt…you feel frustrated… you feel stressed out… you feel anxious…you feel fear. By connecting so much emotion to this story…you make it real. Your thoughts, your actions and how you speak, start to reinforce the story and make it even more believable! But the good news is…it's just a story…it can be re-written and your new story can be one that makes you feel happy, excited and hopeful! I mean, first of all, how can you possibly know for sure you can’t get out of debt? Today is a brand new day…a clean slate…anything that happened in the past is gone, it’s done…Even if you struggled with debt yesterday…it doesn’t mean today has to play out the same way! When you tell yourself you can’t get out of debt…how does it make you feel? Bad? Fearful? Anxious? Stressed? Frustrated? Mad? I don’t know exactly how you feel... but I don’t think you’re jumping up and down, screaming at the top of your lungs, “Woohoo!! I’m up to my arse in debt! " ....No, I don’t think that’s happening. If your story makes you feel anything less than happy…why invest your time and your thoughts into it? Why reinforce that story? Ask yourself these questions…. and give yourself an honest answer. What story would serve you better? Maybe your new story can be, “It is possible for me to get out of debt!” Say it a few times…if the old negative beliefs start creeping in push them aside…even it’s just briefly. How does your new story make you feel? What positive emotions can you connect to it? It does take more than just saying it, to get you to buy into the new story…it has to be totally convincing to you. I mean, you’ve attached so much emotion to the old story…how can you shift that level of emotion (positive emotion) to your new story? And yes, you do need to shift from you your old story to your new story because you can’t have both stories playing in your head at the same time. It’s kinda like trying to drive a car with one foot on the gas and the other on the brake…no matter how hard you push on the gas….the brake (like your negative story) can stop you from getting where you to be. And if it doesn't stop you, it will most certainly make it very difficult for you to get there! That’s why it’s so important to take the power away from that negative story and give it to a new story that supports what you want to achieve. For example: Old story: "I can’t get out of debt because I'm not great at math." New story: “I know how to use a calculator and there’s nothing I need to do that a calculator can’t handle.” Old story: "I’ve tried to get out of debt before, but it just didn’t work for me." New story: “What I was doing before didn’t work…but I can learn new skills that will help me get out of debt.” Old story: “If I’m in debt, I can’t afford to pay someone to help me.” New story: “I really want to make this happen and I will find a way to do it.” If the story you tell yourself, makes you feel anything less than happy…it’s time to re-write it. Your story is meant to make you feel happy, excited and hopeful! Disconnect emotionally and squash the beliefs from your old story. It will take time to create and incorporate your new stories but you can do it! You just have to believe in you and your abilities to make change happen! Have yourself a totally fantabulous day and always let your awesomeness shine! Until next time...
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AuthorGlenda Barrington Archives
April 2021
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